Posts tagged ‘John McCain’

Look Familiar?

After watching this clip from the Daily Show, I’ve drawn this comparison:

Maybe it was kind of obvious, but this just dawned on me! John McCain is like a real-life version of Austin Power’s Dr. Evil – he’s a sort of cranky, bumbling, clueless old man who’s bent on world domination, and completely out of touch with the modern world because he’s been frozen for 35 years. Okay, maybe John McCain wasn’t frozen for 35 years, in which case, what’s his excuse?! Was he just sequestered in his underground lair this whole time, consulting models and sending his adversaries to a fire chamber, with no knowledge of “computers” and “the internet”?  His continued use of air quotes in an often insulting and derogatory manner (see Daily Show clip) is just another way he’s like Mike Meyer’s caricature of the classic Ian Fleming villain. What’s next? Reuniting with his frozen sperm son and doing the macarena in an effort to convince young voters that he is, in fact, hip? If you imagine John McCain trying to do the macarena, wouldn’t it look just like the scene from Austin Powers? I have a feeling that McCain’s administration probably has plans for a secret “laser” somewhere in their agenda, along with a neverending beef with Communist Russia. Save us, Austin! I mean… save us, Mike Meyers! Or… save us, Jon Stewart! C’mon, someone save us. If we’re not careful, soon he’ll be President Evil.

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October 30, 2008 at 12:56 pm 1 comment

On Behalf of Ohioans

We’re not all backwoods bigots.  Most of the people who support McCain aren’t even like this- they’re more likely to be comfortable upper-middle-class people who listen to too much rhetoric.  But that doesn’t make this video turn my stomach any less.

October 19, 2008 at 8:09 pm 4 comments

Vote Or …Don’t

The past two weeks have been a roller coaster for the news media.  Between the proposed plan of spending $700 billion of taxpayer’s money to “fix” the international financial crisis, to every idiotic thing Sarah Palin has said or done, and the drama of the first 2008 Presidential debate, it seemed like even the 24-hour news cycle had trouble keeping up.

Honestly, that’s the trouble with the media.  They’re under so much pressure to be “objective” and “unbiased” and not “lying sacks of shit” that there’s no room for any real analysis of the information they present.  Fortunately, America has one person willing to state the truth: (more…)

September 29, 2008 at 12:35 pm 1 comment

Let’s Talk Politics

I know this is on everyone’s minds, and I just had to post about it. Since John McCain nominated Sarah Palin as his pick for VP, this lady’s been hard to avoid. I didn’t know who she was until Betty brought her up to me last week, saying, quote, “She’s a monster!” I’ve done a little research since then and found out some disturbing things about the woman who would be “one heartbeat away” from the presidency should John McCain win the election.

But first thing’s first, the elephant in the room: am I going to talk about how her 17-year old daughter is pregnant? Yes, but only to say that the attention being paid to this “scandal” is only hurting liberals, because while yes, I suppose her daughter’s actions are something of a reflection on her, there are way more important things that should concern you about Sarah Palin. Teenagers make mistakes and get pregnant and yada yada yada, but this girl isn’t running for a powerful political office, her mother is, and targeting the teen mom-to-be in the media just makes the Palins into victims, and subsequently heroes and martyrs for so  bravely upholding their pro-life values in the face of such staunch adversity and media frenzy. The teen pregnancy debaucle is just inspiring sympathy for Palin and distracting voters from the real issues and her  qualifications (or lack thereof). Obama is right to say that people’s “children are especially off-limits,” and the politics should be kept to the candidates, their platforms, and their previous records. And personally, I do have a lot to say on the high schooler’s unplanned pregnancy and the shotgun wedding that will follow, but that’s not politics and it doesn’t belong here.

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September 4, 2008 at 9:33 pm 8 comments

McCain? More Like McPAIN!

You already know you should vote for Barack because he’s dreamy, but did you know you should also vote for him because he’s not a hateful, out of touch, conservative crazyman?  It’s true!
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August 25, 2008 at 2:19 pm 4 comments


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